Wednesday, June 17, 2009

To my grandmother…

Thanks for everything grandma, love and miss you. ♥

Dear Gramma (as you always preferred to spell it),

I still can't believe you're gone…

This happened too soon but I'll always remember the time we shared. All the summers up in Hiawassee, taking walks, going down to the creek. Playing cards until bedtime. How you used to say you'd take me to Vegas for my 21st birthday. We still had fun those summers, even with "no television".

The trips to Jacksonville too, I always loved that house. And I thought it was amazing that for that year in first grade, I got to live at the house my mom grew up in, in her old room.

I think the most special time we had together was that last trip to Jax, the last time I got to see you. That was in November… I wish I would have come to see you again…

You always told me how proud you were of me, whether it was for my report card of straight A's or for starting my own shop. Those first photos I took, the ones that inspired me to do all this, they were there in Jax. The "famous" works in progress print… I looked at it yesterday and it made me a little sad to see it. I will always think of you and grandpa when I look at now. And how you were so proud of that photo, that you got a print of it and hung it up in your kitchen. Right by the window, even though you could look outside to see the real thing.

And how you sent me all those vintage buttons and things for me to use in my jewelry. Those moonglow-looking ones made the prettiest rings for my shop. And guess what, I sold every last one of them :)

And when Mom called yesterday to tell me that you had gone, one of the first things she said after was that you loved me very much and you were always so proud of me. I don't know if I've ever really thanked you for that, but you and Mom were probably my biggest fans. So thanks :)

Another thing I'll never forget is what you wrote in my card for my 16th birthday, some advice that I've still remembered these past three years. You knew all that was going on in my life then, and you wrote that you wanted me to go out and live my life, and most importantly "not be afraid of it". I cried when I read that, and I think about it pretty often.

So thanks again, you mean so much to me, and I don't know if I ever really told you that. I wish I would have gotten the chance to spend more time with you; I only got to know you for 18 ½ years. And I thought we'd have a lot more time…

We all miss you so much, and my heart just aches for all those you left behind. But Mom is right, now you're not suffering anymore. Say hi to grandpa for me, tell him I wish I'd gotten the chance to know him too. I was so little when he died that I don't really have any memories, just old photos and a couple videos. I guess I'm lucky that I did get the chance to know you better. You both left way too soon, and it makes me so sad… But I'm so thankful for the time we did get. I'll always remember.

love always,

Kelsey.

10 comments:

Amanda Fall - PersistentGreen June 17, 2009 at 5:44 PM  

I'm so sorry about your grandma. I lost mine in February, and I still miss her and think of her often.

This is a beautiful tribute. It sounds as if she gave you wonderful support and memories together.

Hang in there.

Piece Mama June 17, 2009 at 5:48 PM  

Beautifully written, Kelsey. It is really hard to lose a dear, close person in your life. Sending hugs your way. With Peace, Jewel

Love Designs at www.lovescreation.etsy.com June 17, 2009 at 9:03 PM  

What a wonderful dedication to your Grandmother. I'm sorry for your loss Kelsey...I lost my Grandmother about a year ago and while I'm glad she is in a better place, I wish she was here. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
God bless,
Joy

sweetnessjewelry June 17, 2009 at 10:00 PM  

Kelsey I am terribly sorry for your loss :(

biscuit June 18, 2009 at 12:18 AM  

i'm sorry to hear about this. your post was brilliant though. i wish you much peace.

Mia June 18, 2009 at 12:25 AM  

Your Grandma sounds like she was a special lady. Beautiful piece of writing. Keep her spirit in your heart by honoring all that she was.
Blessings Kelsey....

Brenda June 18, 2009 at 12:35 AM  

I am so sorry to hear of your Gramma's passing Kelsey. I can see though, that your wonderful memories of her will stay with you for always. How fortunate you both were to have one another...

Remember the good times..
Brenda

Anonymous June 18, 2009 at 2:21 PM  

Kelsey,
after reading your blog I see just how sweet you are and you remind me so much of your grandpa. They both loved you very much. <3 Jeannie

OceanDreams June 22, 2009 at 12:21 AM  

I'm sorry for your loss. You letter was very heart warming and beautiful. It sounds like you had a wonderful relationship with your grandma and you can cherish so many memories.

Jeanne Selep July 7, 2009 at 10:14 PM  

I pray that your memories of your grandmother give you joy and peace until you meet her again. Your writing reveals that actions can live after we are gone. Thank you for reminding us to appreciate those around us, and inspiring me to be the kind of person that would be missed.

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